Rosie Wooden is a (fictional) affiliate on the VC agency Gentle Conviction. It’s a generalist, multistage fund with places of work in London, Paris and Verbier. It’s not like regular VCs — it doesn’t have to do a tonne of due diligence to determine on an funding. As a substitute, it merely appears to be like for firms and founders which can be fairly good. As a result of fairly good is often ok. Compensate for her different dispatches right here.
For the primary time since I joined a VC fund, I really feel like I even have a private life.
Although the companions make us come into the workplace 5 days per week, everybody goes residence at 6. We aren’t doing any offers, so I spend most of my time making market maps of GenAI firms in smaller European hubs we in all probability gained’t go to, or replying to pitch emails to inform founders we’re in search of profitability so aren’t . A few of my colleagues are even going to pilates lessons at lunch.
My challenge for the gradual days? Getting myself a date for Valentine’s Day. Time to load up Bumble once more.
Fortunately, I’ve a reasonably thick pores and skin in terms of speaking to tech founders and males in finance — the one individuals I appear to match with on the app — so I don’t instantly throw my cellphone throughout the room after I get messages like those Tom Blomfield sends his SF honeys.
I couldn’t imagine my luck after I matched with the one and solely Harold Steblings, the well-known podcaster-turned-VC. Positive he’s a couple of years youthful than me (he nonetheless has an opportunity at relationship Leonardo DiCaprio), and he does appear to spend rather a lot of time tweeting, and his Bumble profile pic is identical because the one on Crunchbase… however it felt like destiny was taking part in me an excellent hand.
Our first date was at The Pelican in Notting Hill. He apologised prematurely as a result of he wasn’t consuming and was additionally doing a January quick so he wouldn’t be having any meals both, however I used to be simply glad for the possibility to truly meet him.
Any probability of getting something near a 20-minute dialog, nonetheless, was rapidly spoiled. On the pub, we instantly bumped into the 19-year-old German edtech founder everyone seems to be speaking about, who was having dinner with Margot Robbie and some different semi-famous individuals. And like every good VC, Harold abides by the rule that one ought to at all times be closing a deal, so we ended up having dinner with them. However I acquired the edtech founder’s WhatsApp so I assume a win for me?
I took an Uber residence and texted Harold to thank him for the good evening. I acquired a reply the subsequent morning.
“Thanks a lot for a terrific evening. Hear you guys are having hassle fundraising so in all probability not going to work out. However let me know if I might be useful!”
The suggestions I acquired by way of a good friend who additionally is aware of Harold is that he’s in search of a lady at Collection A who can follow-on in his seed-stage rounds. I assume it wasn’t meant to be. I respect a person who needs to remain on technique — there actually weren’t lots of these on the market final 12 months.
For my subsequent date, I made a decision to strive one thing totally different. I assumed going for a growth-stage crossover investor would imply they’d have some extra time — development is lifeless proper now, proper? — however it seems they’re type of PE bros disguising themselves with Allbirds, they usually’re doing loads of due diligence on offers that will or might not get performed, which makes scheduling a date kinda onerous. After two weeks of diary back-and-forth, we acquired there: drinks at 6pm in Mayfair on a Tuesday (he was flying to France the subsequent day to take a look at a fintech deal).
He was tremendous cute — and even wore an precise button-down shirt (although he had a gilet on prime). We had the identical pursuits: cooking (although he by no means has time to do it) and the outside (although he by no means has time to go). However someway, he wasn’t into the dialog. He stored checking his cellphone and even took a fast founder name midway by way of our date (I caught up on emails).
When he got here again, we began speaking about his agency’s portfolio. It may need been the flowery cocktail however I by accident performed the honesty card and blurted out what I actually thought.
“I don’t know why you’re so busy. None of your portcos is definitely doing that properly, proper? Most have performed layoffs and I heard that the pet tech one is blowing by way of money…”
It was like a lightweight had gone off in his mind. He was immediately obsessive about me — the one that had dared to say it like it’s. He’s already despatched me flowers forward of Valentine’s Day and we’re going to Soho Home Paris this weekend.
Till subsequent time, let me know the way I might be useful,
Rosie
